My Story

I was 5 when I realized other people didn’t see energy. No one was expecting to walk through walls, or fly, or anything. So I decided to keep quiet about how weird I thought this planet is. I knew I didn't belong and yet, here I am. At 16, the energies increased. I realized I was crazy, or there was more to life than what could be seen by most people. But not knowing what to do with my unusual perspective, I intensely explored the physical plane by getting a black belt. Then, I ran in the other direction and attended a prestigious liberal arts college, Macalester in St. Paul, Minnesota. Where I studied math and the computers, and also did a bunch of drugs. Which made perfect sense to me at the time.

After almost dying that first year of college, I turned my addictive personality towards certifications and retreats. I began my first real search for meaning, studying both healing and spiritual philosophy to understand the body and mind and their essential integration. I have had the great fortune to have studied many ancient wisdoms with brilliant teachers. Decades of  alternative healing approaches to health, wellness, and spiritual growth. They have all helped me discover underlying truths.

Full of faith but lacking clarity of career purpose, I tried to be a "normal" person. So I married a guy, and explored employment options. Working in a variety of fields including photography, bakery, appliance sales, video sales, and security guard. Long story short, he became a cop and decided to never have kids. After divorcing and couch surfing, I was still taking classes. Still seeking what is the truth behind it all. I was finally inspired by the ability of Network Spinal Analysis to change people lives. 

I entered chiropractic school in 1994 and become a Doctor of Chiropractic, and concurrently got ordained, and got a degree in addiction. Cause it takes one to know one and I couldn't do less than a 14 hour day. A deeper calling that I just couldn't ignore. But by the end of school, I got remarried to a chiropractor, and we moved to Colorado to start a business and a family. We had 2 kids in 3 years. Did all the organic stuff from water tub birth to family bed. I tried so hard!

Truthfully, I have learned more through my successes and failures in personal relationships than from all the classes I have taken combined. My daughter's health brought to light irreconcilable philosophies with her dad. And a spectacularly disastrous divorce. I started dating women. Explored a variety of relationship communities. Whill continuing our health journey as a mostly single parent, at the age of 50 we were diagnosed with Ehlers Danlos. EDS explains my endless longing for ease in the body. It is a complex, painful, genetic, collagen disorder and I passed it on to my daughter. It was like the clouds parted and so many things became clear. But it was challenging to see. 

Trying to figure out what was going on was a trip! From the energetics of it in Astrology or Human Design. To the combination of energy and physical planes with things like reflexology or shiatsu. Communicating about it with Non-violent Communication or Love Languages. Living with it while seeing gurus and pain management clinics. So many perspectives!  Some of you know of IEP and 504s. Between grief, exhaustion, and a momma bear tenacity, I kept studying, while caretaking my kids, and running an office. I know what it is to work hard and succeed. And to work hard only to fail.

Every disaster from losing my office in a flood to having a mTBI auto accident, pushed me to learn more about suffering and acceptance. But also more about when to make a boundary, hire lawyers and double down. All the skills necessary for success.  Lately I have become a mentor/guide for Jeffery Martin, The 45 day Awakening Challenge and Fundamental Wellbeing. Since I have been in locations 1-10+, the muddy teens, and it all coming together  in nonduality. His book and classes were another turn of the spiral in my understanding of existence from a new set of vocabulary. There is a way to transcend it all. Now, I have begun speaking on Awakening and the Dual Life of being Pure Existence and yet a body walking around dealing with “other” people. The step before Non-Duality. Being with multiple perspectives. 

To actually "feel" grounded in my body. To experience the freedom of no self. And also not be a doormat for my ex. To embrace higher principles and still live a life in the regular world. That is what I am calling the Dual Life. The middle path. We don't have to give up being successful with money, relationships, parenting, "house holders" to become awake. To be ready to embody non-duality. We need both.

There are more steps in becoming a better human, finding awakening, and allowing liberation that one might imagine. So on the Q&A calls and coaching sessions, I may come from the perspective of being a human in a body that needs care. Or from the view of a parent, child, or wife. Roles that are still parts of my life, although not who I am. Or from a non-existent, non-dual,  no self. Whatever fits the situation in the now. We co-create the moment together because there is really only one.